Comic relief…..Woody Allen on death

I’m not afraid of death,  I just don’t want to be there when it happens.

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If you want to make God  laugh, tell him about your plans.

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You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.

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If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss Bank.

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Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.

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What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.

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I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

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The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

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I hate reality but it’s still the best place to get a good steak.

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Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.

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About mash12000

Freelance writer
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2 Responses to Comic relief…..Woody Allen on death

  1. Satish Babusenan says:

    really had a good laff 🙂 thnx for ur efforrts Mash.

  2. Satish Babusenan says:

    Spiritual chewing-gum is like every other chewing-gum. Trample underfoot.at your own peril!
    – Anonymous

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